Monday, April 14, 2008

To be or not to be... trusting

Trust is a funny thing. It's not something that's tangible. You can't touch it or taste it. None of the 5 senses apply. It's not actually something. It's a concept, an ideal, and most importantly - an illusion. It's one of the few things out there where the more you think you have, the less you actually have. The reason for this is that you take this thing called trust and you hand it over to other people. It opens you and makes you vulnerable. It's always a chance and risk. You have to give your trust to someone to see if they are worth of it. If they are, lucky you. If they aren't then it's too late isn't it? If you don't give your trust away, then you'll never know if that person was worth in the first place and what happens? You end up bitter, cynical and basically alone. You're free of confidants and a consigliere.

In this day and age, we all have so much going on. Our lives are so much bigger than ourselves. We're busy, we're stressed, we need assistance and we seek the counsel of those outside our comfort zone and bring them into it in hopes of finding an objective opinion.

Earlier I said cynical. This is a term for someone who mistrusts others without just cause. A default reaction to people as a whole. An alternative to cynicism is jadedness. This is a word to describe those that have been burned by others; those that have reliquinshed control of their trust and learned the hard way that they shouldn't have. This is where your old pal Vig finds himself.

Too often have I given the benefit of the doubt to those who were not deserving of it, in the end. Luckily, it's not that simple. For once, complications in my life and my propensity to attract dramatic scenarios have paid off. I'll explain. When I give my trust, I almost NEVER give 100% of it. I give most but not all. This is a combination of cynicism and jadedness. I've also been blessed with 2 sides of a coin - a healthy level of intellect AND a deep understanding of street smarts (which are just edgier versions of common sense). I also have an uncanny ability to read people. I'm NOT infallible, however. There have been instances where I've gotten the red-ass [read: taken advantage off].

Most of my blogs serve a purpose or have a message. This doesn't really speak out to any one individual person. Some people reading this may wonder if it was meant to cause internal reflection for him/her. I'm not going to answer that question. This could be caused by my own internal reflection. It could be caused by a recent/current event. It could just be the most recent, random thought that passes through my brain - thoughts that stayed internal before the advent of the Internet where we've all been given a voice to rant ad nauseum to the always connected international community.

As an aside, you may remember that the Internet was once referred to as the "Information Superhighway" but you don't hear that term much anymore, if at all. Rather, the Internet seems to have become the vehicle of the masses instead of the path on which information travels.

It's self-serving, much like alot of what we do. This blog is self-serving. All blogs are self-serving. Not a selfless act exists anymore, it seems. We're all selfish - some of us by our misguided need to place blind trust in other faulted individuals and others by our ability to exploit the former half sand the trust that is given. We all view the world as a big steaming pile of me. And therein lies our catch-22; there's the rub. The circular motion and self-perpetuating cycle.

I don't have advice, suggestions or solution. Why is the sky blue? Why is water wet? Why do we allow those who we believe to be our companions to plunge the proverbial knife into our collective backs and twist? Some things just are.

Comment if you wish. Just don't ask.

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